Are you outsourcing your own intuition?
How to stop looking for external validation when making a decision and trust yourself again
Do you feel like you need external validation in order to make a decision? Are you constantly asking friends, family members, co-workers, and anyone who will listen for their opinion before making a decision? Do you try to place your worries on someone else by siphoning your power over to them?
If you are - you’re outsourcing your own intuition. I struggled with this for years. I always wanted validation from those around me before moving forward. I would let their opinion sway me much more than my own inner knowing. The real reason I did this - was because I didn’t trust myself. I didn’t believe in myself enough to make the decision that I already knew was the right one.
“I believe in intuitions and inspirations...I sometimes FEEL that I am right. I do not KNOW that I am.” - Albert Einstein
And what did that do? Create dissatisfaction, hopelessness, and resentment. Instead of taking the step towards my desired outcome - instead I tried to please those around me based off their opinions - and they usually didn’t even care! This isn’t necessarily a bad thing either - it wasn’t their responsibility to care. It is not the responsibility of those around you to decide what you should do in any given situation - it is yours. Even if they did care, it’s still not their responsibility!
When you outsource your intuition, what you’re really doing is creating the illusion of placing the accolades (or blame) onto them. “Oh, my mom told me to pursue this career path and that’s why I’m unhappy now” - that’s usually how the story goes. The people around you are allowed to have an opinion, but that doesn’t mean that it has anything to do with your decisions and consequently - your actions.
“Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice.” - Steve Jobs
How can you practice reconnecting with your intuition instead of outsourcing your decision making? I’m glad you asked! I’d like to share a simple, easy, and fast practice I use when I’m struggling with a decision. Remember - it’s ok to struggle with a decision, the key is remembering to come home to yourself and access the answer that you already know. Here’s what I do:
Get quiet. Get into a quiet space. Nature, your office, your bedroom, your closet - wherever you can get some peace & solitude.
Relax. Take a moment to breath in through your nose, hold, breath out through your mouth. Calm down your nervous system.
Simply ask. There is no need to overcomplicate this - all you have to do is ask. Ask your higher self for guidance.
Listen. Again - DO NOT overthink it! When I do this, the answer I hear, or really feel, is almost instantaneous. When it feels good in your body, you will know it’s the right decision.
That’s it! Simple enough right? It really is simple, sometimes hearing the words “higher self” can sound so mystical and far away when in reality - your higher self is always right there, with you.
Now, this can take some practice and repetition. If it’s been awhile since you’ve done some sort of intuition practice or you’ve been disconnected, it can be like riding a bike again. Maybe a little wobbly, but don’t worry - you’ll be pedaling in no time.
I can’t reiterate it enough - do not overthink this. Remember that you already have all the tools you need. You are already enough. You know the answer.
With care,
Chelsea Popovich | Aligned Healing Coach ✨